How Miley Cyrus Defeated the Avengers

Once upon a time, there was a group of superheroes known as the Avengers. In the summer of 2012, the Avengers assembled and surprised expectations by breaking the domestic opening-weekend record. Proudly, they displayed the Top Ten Opening-Weekend Films:

1. Marvel's The Avengers ($207,438,708)
2. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 ($169,189,427)
3. The Dark Knight ($158,411,483)
4. The Hunger Games ($152,535,747)
5. Spider-Man 3 ($151,116,516)
6. The Twilight Saga: New Moon ($142,839,137)
7. The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 1 ($138,122,261)
8. Pirates of theCaribbean: Dead Man’s Chest ($135,634,554)
9. Iron Man 2 ($128,122,480)
10. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 ($125,017,372)

Dismayed, stars of other blockbuster films united in an attempt to prove to the Avengers that they weren't so much better than everyone else. Their solution? Adjust for inflation! Maybe that would work. So they introduced the Top Ten Opening-Weekend Films (Adjusted For Inflation):

1. Marvel’s The Avengers ($207,438,708)
2. The Dark Knight ($174,738,000)
3. Spider-Man 3 ($173,959,700)
4. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 ($168,763,300)
5. Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest ($164,003,900)
6. Spider-Man ($156,551,700)
7. The Hunger Games ($152,535,747)
8. The Twilight Saga: New Moon ($148,657,800)
9. Shrek the Third ($140,015,100)
10. The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 1 ($139,709,900)

The other films couldn't believe it. The Avengers had beaten them again. They were about to abandon all hope, when suddenly a young blonde girl walked in. "I know how to beat the Avengers," she said. "Those superheros got, like, a ton of help from being in so many theaters. Let's look at how many tickets were sold per-theater!" And with that, the blonde enigma of a girl unveiled the Top Ten Opening-Weekend Films per-Theater:

1. Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert Tour (6,346)
2. Marvel’s The Avengers (6,022)
3. Spider-Man (5,468)
4. The Blair Witch Project (5,222)
5. Spider-Man 3 (5,166)
6. The Dark Knight (5,053)
7. Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest (5,010)
8. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 (4,871)
9. Borat (4,826)
10. The Lost World: Jurassic Park (4,790)

The other films gasped (and the Avengers all feinted) when the blonde girl removed her wig and revealed herself to be Miley Cyrus. And that is the story of how Miley Cyrus defeated the Avengers.

Retold from an original CNN article.